I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize