Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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