is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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