My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
