well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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