just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
420 ftw
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
