You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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