I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
