Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
