dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Randomize
