I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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