my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
All I want is dick and wine.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
