my mouth tastes like poor choices
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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