never play flip cup with pint glasses
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
