Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
