"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize