my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize