I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
