I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
