We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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