I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
