I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
