He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
