But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize