Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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