drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
