So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
