in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
the day after is always just damage control
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
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