hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
My room smells like vodka and shame
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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