She is in my trunk
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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