some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I want to have your abortion
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
