Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
