His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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