found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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