people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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