I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Randomize
