Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize