It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
