She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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