Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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