Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
