i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
