sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Randomize
