I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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