Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
