genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
