i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
What a dumb baby whore.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
