oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
