Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I touched a dick in church today
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
