awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
